James Harden officially wants out of Houston, and it sounds like he’s going to get traded in the near future. This news bummed me out, so I’d like to say goodbye to The Beard once and for all. I know; this is a weird format. But I’ve written several blogs already about the woes and tribulations of being a sports fan in Houston, and if I’m going to whine, I need to at least be creative about it.

The last thing I want is for this blog to sound like one of those fake jersey burning videos on Instagram. Y’all know what I’m talking about; the ones where a high schooler puts his favorite player’s jersey on his parents’ barbecue pit and acts like he’s about to burn it, before revealing a sappy message like “Thank you for the memories.” God, those are played out. Think of this more as a drunken speech you’d give at a friend’s moving-away party before puking in their aloe vera plant. Here goes nothing:

Dear James,

Unless every major NBA journalist in the country is lying, it sounds like you’re ready to leave the Rockets. Ready enough to turn down a 2-year extension worth north of $100 million. That’s disappointing news, to say the least.

You had a storied run as a Rocket, including eight trips to the All-Star game, six All-NBA First Team seasons, three scoring titles, and an MVP. Those individual accolades are great, but you never brought a title to the city of Houston. I know it’s kind of hard to when Kevin Durant joins a 73-9 Warriors squad in the middle of your prime, but it would’ve been special to see a ring in this era of Rockets basketball.

I understand the temptation to leave. At 31 years old, your prime starts waning, and I don’t see the Rockets improving much in the offseason. The organization threw away our future by trading draft picks and filling cap space in an effort to keep up with Golden State. I still believe that we would have took the ship in 2018 if Chris Paul hadn’t pulled his hammy in Game 6 of the Western Conference Finals. That really was our year.

After falling just short, the Rockets traded CP3 for Russell Westbrook. As a career critic of Russ, I never loved this move. He’s one of the most gifted athletes that the league has seen in the past decade, but he’s not a reliable shooter in the slightest. My doubts were proven to be spot on, as he repeatedly shot the team out of close games, especially when the playoffs rolled around. Turns out, he wants out of Houston too. Go figure.

I’m going to miss the volume scoring, insane highlights, and MVP performances that you’ve given us in the past eight years, but I’m also going to miss the iconic figure that you were in our city. Whether it was the unkempt facial hair, the goofy interviews, or the not-so-private visits to strip clubs, you did things your way. You were willing to play alongside rigid superstars like CP3 and Russ, and you oftentimes found a way to make it work. We never found the treasure, but sometimes, the real prize is the friendships you build along the way.

Best wishes, Beard. Give those Brooklyn strippers love for me.

Sincerely,
TFMike